born serene oh but not old.
nicknamed the old one now.
i stress, i am not old.
i would prefer to be called, mature.

It's not a dream if it came true,
but we exist to dream.
Make a wish,
I'm your faithful genie that doesn't have much patience :)

Designer: lovebites
Image: monatheydidnt
Image Host: Tinypic
Image done in Photoshop CS2

i miss reynard already. i wish i could go and send him off on thursday. but i am so sure that my mom won't allow. damn.

reynard yeo ying shen, i love you!!

Something i stole from other people's blog who stole it from another person.

One Flaw In Women
By the time the Lord made woman,
He was into his sixth day of working overtime.
An angel appeared and said,"Why are you spending so much time on this one?"
the Lord answered,"Have you seen my spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and able to run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart-and she will do everything with only two hands."
The angel was astounded at the requirements."Only two hands!? No way !And that's just on the standard model? That's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish."
"But I won't," the Lord protested.
"I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days."
The angel moved closer and touched the woman.
"But you have made her so soft, Lord."
"She is soft," the Lord agreed,
"but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."
"Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.
The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason and negotiate."
The angel then noticed something,and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek.
"Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model.I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."
"That's not a leak," the Lord corrected,"that's a tear!"
"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.
The Lord said,"The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride."
The angel was impressed."You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything! Woman is truly amazing."
And she is!

Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.

Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideals.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have vital things to say and everything to give.

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

isn't it nice? so cool right? man. i love women. guys sucks. they are jerks. all men are bad. insensitive creature. i kinda hope i'm les and like girls but i can't. irritating.

the female species is the most beautiful thing God has created.

went to bugis yesterday. celebration in school as disappointing so i don't think i'll say anything about it. i will go on non-stop. haha. anyway, bugis rocks. haha. that's so random. haha. i was there from like 2+ to 8+. i rock right? was with dearest and jm till 5+ then nex came over after that. haha. we talked and crapped and shopped and played with make-up. haha. lovin it, balabababa.

had FFFF yesterday. i didn't expect it to go on till this year. kinda surprised when she asked me if i gonna meet them. wow. it's been a year and this tradition still goes on, with the usual 5. actually, i's only 3 yesterday. oh wells. had a great time in starbucks, just talking and crapping. those sessions rocks. i so love talking to my beloved darlings. caught up with them on stuff, especially since it's been more than 2 months since i've last seen them.

love yesterday. reached home after 12 la. haha. didn't get scolded very badly though. hee. i should use their name more often when i go out. then i can stay out longer. haha. evil me. oh wells.

latest obsession: ckone and make-up stuff. haha. those are really fun stuff. all thanks to the time spent in sasa. haha. i can't wait to go bugis again and lay my hands on the make-up items. haha. fun fun fun. hee.

okay okay. it's cny eve. happy cny to you people tomorrow. yups yup. get more angpow so i can demand more things from you people. hee. see you people soon. love love love.

p.s. it's girl girl's chinese birthday today. yayers. she's born on cny eve. hee.
watched memoirs yesterday. sorry grace. i was supposed to watch with you right? i only remembered when the movie's starting. sorry dear. okay. i kinda love it. ya. quite nice what. ahma, where got slow? you old people cannot take it is it? haha. yah. gong li is such a 'slut' in the show. but she made it so real. that means she a good actress right? hee. michelle yeoh was okay. we decided she's too westernised for a geisha. haha. zhang ziyi was not too bad. not really fantastic but overall, okay. guess what? i think the best actress has to be the supporting actress who acted as pumpkin. she was really really good. really. i guess, 'bad' roles are better to show the skills of an actress than a 'good' role. yups yup. there are like a few parts that i wanted to cry so much. okay okay. i hear you people saying,"yah. like which movie you don't feel like crying?" sorry lah. people emotional can? hee. anyway, i didn't let the tears out though. cos i was with my classmates and there's a guy la. like how am i suppose to show him my tear stricken face? and if the girls saw it, they might just laugh at me. i have really mean and gossipy classmates. haha. overall, i'm happy with the show. and if someone wants to treat me to it, i can accept watching it a second time. *hint hint*

oh. a little cha qu. you know there is this part where there's supposed to be a sex scene right? well, they didn't show it and like the actress will do such scenes but they showed the starting a bit. like entering the room and lying down on the bed. haha. well, my dearest male classmate clayton was damn excited la. then we were like,"ugh. guys being guys. disgusting." (by the way, he thinks that that is the most exciting part of the show. guys.) after he realised that they didn't show it, he was like so disappointed. sigh. and we were totally disgusted.

and guess what? my class girls are so les. haha. okay, touchy in the literal way. for example eliza. she's from plmgs so she's used to a girls school thing la. and apparently, her school people slaps each other's boobs and pinches the butts. haha. it was quite an experience when she did it to me. haha. so now, i'm actually do that. haha. and we can just touch each other's boobs and butts, you know. really. it's so les right? clayton can't take it totally, especially after he saw me touch eliza's boobs. haha. he thinks we are curvy. like crooked la. haha. and he's trying so hard to learn how to tell les apart from normal girls, for his future he says. you know, guys just suck at this kind of things and he seems to be rather proud to know 2 lesbians. we were like,"oh. whatever. we know like so many more." haha. his man's pride must be hurt by now. haha. this line sounds wrong. oh wells.

i'm hungry. very hungry. sigh. and i have econs tutorial to do. and vcds to watch. okay okay. off to watch my vcds. take care. you know i love you.
i finished the book. and i sorta hate it. i can't understand the book. i feel so defeated. it's like the first time in my life i can't understand a book. then again, i guess it's meant for the readers to decide? to think it through? i'll feel better if it is this way.

i feel so down. so mean. i should just stop shooting my mouth off. i talk too much. crapped too much. hurt too many feelings. even though they know i'm just joking and don't take it too heart. i feel so bad. my chest seems to be empty. hollow. as if, there's no heart anymore. or should i put it in this way, as if it's hanging in the air. holding on to nothing. i hate nights. they make me feel like this.

i feel like giving up. but i can't.
cos i don't know what i want to give up.
i very tired.
very tired.
i don't know. i wanted to say so much but my short term memory has really allowed me to forget everything, except for one. the book that i'm reading now.

it's called the moth diaries by rachel klein. at first, i thought the story will be really interesting after reading the synopsis. (pardon my spelling) being very excited, i began reading. the first few pages were alright but i felt a little sleepy. maybe it was because i was reading on the bus early in the morning. as the time moves by, it seems to get a little more interesting. while reading on the bus on my way to tj just now, something struck me. the main story teller is such a pathetic girl. she dwells in self-pity and thinks that she's too high and mighty for a lot of people. well, she felt this way cos she's a top student in her class and her father passed away not long ago. but, it's starting to get on my nerves. like, she's always saying stuff that's so one-sided. then again, it's supposed to be journal of hers so it'll only be one sided right? oh wells.

everyone has a part that allows us, unknowingly, to dwell in self-pity. at least i think so. it's like a natural reaction. i was reading about some personality mail yesterday and i think it's kind of contradicting. first it says that i am a selfless person but later in the mail, it was stated that i am selfish person too. this is weird right? after thinking, i realised that no one can be truly selfless, unless you are Christ. for He died upon the cross for our sins. everyone only thinks about themselves, however much we deny it. it's actually a fact, not an assumption.

i think i'm having an overdoes of economics already. i seems to be talking econs to my classmate just now. i was just going on and on about why he shouldn't be saying such a stuff as it's only an opinion, which is normative. blah blah blah. i think he got a little shocked by me. i'm sorry. i'm a pure econs student who loves it to the core.

i want to be a philosopher. (pardon my spelling again) i think it'll be really interesting. to study the philosophy of life and everything else. then again, i want to study psychology too. i want to know what's going on in the human brains that make them do certain stuff. that results in certain actions and behaviour. it's so fascinating, don't you think so? human is such an interesting topic of study. the way human thinks too. i can some sort of see myself going into that direction some day, eventually.

how i wish i can write. write fluently. write in such a manner that it touches everyone. that everyone will understand. how i wish i can write poems that people can relate to. write stories that people can relate to. if only i can write. then again, you might as i can write. who can't? but, i have such a limited vocab and my written english is atrocious, though not as bad as my spoken english. do you think i can write? ya. i mean, i can write about crappy stuff, everyday stuff but i can't write the way i want to write. oh wells.
today's such a great day. firstly, i found out who my econs, gp and me tutors are. rather nice people. i don't mind lessons with them. hope my me teacher can be my maths tutor too. hee.

hmm. supposed to celebrate windri's birthday today but due to the fact that a lot of us end at 5.15, i didn't go in the end. cos i have a date with my dearest ahma!! hee.wanted to play a prank on caoyang and we almost succeeded, if only christiana had hid properly. ugh. wasted efforts. haha.

ahma. hee. we ate kfc. again!! haha. like we seems to be eating that so often. haha. and we bought shoes!! wooyeah. hee. new shoes time tomorrow. haha. the shop assistants at yellow are so funny la. like..weird. haha. making lots of noise and crap around with us. haha. i so like them can. haha.

passed the things to dar finally. haha. awkward leh. haha. even when i was running away, i was still warning him not to look at the present. haha. dam funny. i must have looked very comical and unglam. damn. haha. he said they are very thoughtful presents. yays. haha. let's hope he meant it. haha.

i'm hungry again. oh no. worms are growing in my tummy. haha. i really hope not.

ohs. one more thing. haha. i realised retaining is really good. i can actually understand chem and maths. like. wow. haha. i can understand functions la. i'm like so proud of myself. haha. and my classmates don't even understand or take so long to understand lo. hee. i'm so happy. haha. even in chem, the most basic things that the teacher did, they also don't know. haha. i'm like..wooyeah. haha. i kinda like retaining now. haha.

okay. hungry. i should just go and search for my econs info, check my subject syllabus, download the answers to my chem tutorial and read my newspapers and geog and econs textbooks now. tata. take care dearies. don't study too much. haha. what an irony. look at me!! ahaha. mugger in transition.
wow. my official time table is out. i feel so sad. it's like so 'free', in a way that i end late but a lot of gaps in between la. ugh. that's why i had to go and xiaolongbao with ahma today instead of thurs. i end at 1615 on thursdays la. sigh.

i love shopping. hee. ahma said i SPLURGED! i did? did i? i don't think so. it's once in a lifetime. forgive me okay. i love you so much more. ((:

anyway, i saw sherm just now. wah. my gentlemen, in a beng way. his hair looks beng. his actions maybe a little but he is a gentlemen. refined guy. not bad seh. ahma, you know right? hee. long sleeve, long black pants, leather shoes, suitcase and jacket in his hands. wow. every bit a working man, just that he's in poly. i think he had a presentation today. how coincidental. it's like, i never get to see anyone from nyp in yio chu kang till today, and it has to be sherm. someone i just knew. weird. i've been wanting to like bump into yJ for so long. haha. i need to see how he looks like in real life la. internet is such a virtual place. ya.

okay. i'm hungry. i need food.

i so want to keep the pullover for myself. the fragrance too. ahma, we share the fragrance la. then i keep the pullover. we can think of other things to get him. haha. like a cheapo shirt. haha.

i so can't wait to see my darlin again. yayers. soon. like soon. haha. i'm hungry. can't think now. ohhs. heal the world rocks. haha.
((:
i love this song. heal the world by mj. i heard it when i worked at the bishan branch. they were playing this concert vcd. i love this song so much. makes me feel like crying.

http://www.mjparadise.com/Dansk_LyricsContext.asp?id=93
get the lyrics from there. too lazy to copy.
rocks my life.

heal the world.
i want to write so much. but i don't know what to write about. man. i'm contradicting.

staring at your reflection every day, can make or break my heart away.
when you don't listen to what's hard for me to say.

credits to yj. aww. i think some girl must have broken his heart recently. like his nicks seems to be so heartbreaking. hope he's fine. didn't dare to ask.

i miss you, so much.
but, who are you?
i have no idea.
maybe, just maybe
you can appear in front of me
and show me
you
well well well. i love ahma. i love me. i love mugging. i am so gonna get my minimum of 4Bs this promos. yays!!

and i rock. hee. i read. i read. i read. okay. be amazed, but i read. i love reading. and i hope i'll start loving to read textbooks and notes real soon.

anything else? hmm. loy fatt's in my class. cutie. i'm in arts fac. i'm in 06A6. i'm the only retainee in my class. prolly the only in arts fac.

and, i think this entry is so weird. like blah! okay.

laters.
i love you so, and you know it.
yups yup.
it's you i'm talking about.
yes. you!
i'll have you floating in my mind hokays.
Can't Get You Out Of My Head by Kylie Minogue

La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la

I just can't get you out of my head
Boy, your love is all I think about
I just can't get you out of my head
Boy, your lovin' is all I'm thinkin' 'bout

La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la

I just can't get you out of my head
Boy, your love is all I think about
I just can't get you out of my head
Boy, it's more than I care to think about

Every night
Every day
Just to be there in your arms

Won't you stay
Won't you lay
Stay forever and ever and ever

La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la

I just can't get you out of my head
Boy, your love is all I think about
I just can't get you out of my head
Boy, it's more than I care to think about

There's a dark secret in me
Don't leave me locked in your heart

Set me free
Feel the need in me
Set me free
Stay forever and ever and ever

La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la

I just can't get you out of my head
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la - la, la, la, la, la

[can't get you out of my head, boy.]
Everytime by Britney Spears

Notice me
Take my hand
Why are we
Strangers when
Our love is strong
Why carry on without me?

Everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you're haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I make believe
That you are here
It's the only way I see clear
What have I done
You seem to move on easy

Everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
feel so small
I guess I need you baby
Everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you're haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I may have made it rain
Please forgive me
My weakness caused you pain
And this song is my sorry
At night I pray
That soon your face
Will fade away

Everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you're haunting me
I guess I need you baby

[i love this song so much]
i'm in a state of hallucination. everyone i see, i think it's you. i'm thinking way too much. too much. can't you just get out of my head? no? well. i'll try till you get out.
it's a new blog add. yups yup. think i got hooked on to it. haha. thanks to my ahma. hee. if you manage to come here, good for you. if you didn't, you won't be reading this.
((:
just when i thought i have gotten you, it seems like i haven't.
i shouldn't have gone for orientation. everytime i see someone who resembles you, your image floats in my mind. and stays there for a long while.
maybe, i haven't gotten over the old you, but hates the new you.
i don't know. i don't know.
oh wells. memories will be beautiful forever right. it better be.