born serene oh but not old.
nicknamed the old one now.
i stress, i am not old.
i would prefer to be called, mature.

It's not a dream if it came true,
but we exist to dream.
Make a wish,
I'm your faithful genie that doesn't have much patience :)

Designer: lovebites
Image: monatheydidnt
Image Host: Tinypic
Image done in Photoshop CS2

i was just thinking about the word bestie. chanced upon it some time this year while net surfing. anyway, i realised a lot of people has more than one bestie, besties to be accurate.

i wonder. how can one have more than one best friend? when i was younger, primary school that is, i thought it could happen too. but now, i realised that the love, the bond, is only there for one only. there's only such a special bond with one person and no one else.

to think of it, i don't have a best friend. at least, not now. but i have tons of good friends. i believe, they are enough for me. maybe i've reached a stage in life where i do not need a best friend anymore. i am just totally independent. or maybe, i just suck so much that i don't have a best friend. i think the first reason sounds better. hah.

then again, maybe in later stages of life, i'll need a bestie. but now, i am just really happy with all my good friends. really good friends. i love you guys lots.

p.s. actually, i recorded this part down with my mp3 player and just nice, my radio was on. it was playing ye zi by ah sang. i think the song fits this entry. all by myself. doing everything, all by myself.

p.p.s. what happened after i fnished recording and listening to my recording, my mp3 played forever friend by alan kuo. fate. this must be fate. friends, will be forever, whether they are good or best.
((:
i have so many things to say. that i don't know what to say.

01. i would love to say, fight for your own happiness. no matter how hurt you might get, fight for it. however, i have seen so many cases of pain that i can't seem to keep to that belief anymore. then again, with the hurt, you grow. you mature. you..get less painful. the first time, it'll hurt like mad. second time, might be equally as bad. but, it'll get better. cos we won't care about putting ourselves in whole-heartedly anymore. that's a reason why people nowadays are having more and more relationships. cos they can't be bothered about it anymore. why do i sound so much like a love consultan when i've never gone through it before? that's the cruelty of life. making me know about stuff before going through them. and when the time comes for us to go through it, we will stupidly forget about whatever we've learnt and put ourselves in "danger". only then, do we really learn the lesson, hard.

sometimes, i think it's not so good to know so much. cos we won't be as pure as we were. as we once were. as we once were...
i'm awake. like finally. and i am still hungry. haha. there's still no food at home. how? so tempted to call for macs but there's just one opposite my house. calling will waste an extra $2. but i am dam lazy to walk. sigh.

i hate the feeling of being HUNGRY!!
by the way, i've just finished reading the chronicles are narnia. okay. 3 parts of it. man. i love the stories. totally amazing. i wonder where did c.s.lewis get all his inspiration from. the story is so, out of the world. now, i can't wait for the movie. hope it's good. unlike the latest installment of harry potter.

i read so many books in this few weeks that i don't remember what i've read. haha. see. told ya i'm senile. anyway, i remembering reading from a mag about 2 years back that females who don't reread their books are more likely to be tired of their partners faster. haha. i guess i am one of them. cos i don't reread my books, unless i am really bored and there's nothing else to do. the chances are very low though i just finished rereading the faraway tree by enid blyton. okay. go ahead and laugh at me, but i just have the urge to read it again. and i also finished rereading a book i had when i was in pri school. it's with my cousin now and i managed to stumble upon it yesterday. hee. guess what? now i feel like rereading totochan. haha. guess what i said just now wasn't that true eh. or..i am going through a new period in life, a transition period. mm. haha.

i am still hungry. and i've been hungry for hours. every night, i am haunted by hunger. every night when the clock strikes 11. i am hungry. do i have a disease? or it is just a bad habit? but i can't eat after like 8. cos it'll be hard to digest and hence, harder for me to lose fats. urgh. someone, force me to sleep before i get hungry. this cycle is bad. i sleep at ungodly hours and wake up when the sun is about to set. okay. this is too exaggerated but i wake when the sun has traveled more than half the sky. guess what time i woke yesterday? 2.30pm!! man. if this goes on, i am so gonna die when the school term starts. and also, my face is breaking out. yes, thanks to my good sleeping habits. damn.

haha. i think sleeping later has allowed me to blog a lot eh. haha. i guess, i do function well early in the morning. hope my parents don't find me before i sleep. or else, i'll be dead. with them nagging non-stop at my ears. poor little things. :((
did i mention i am very hungry? food will make a good christmas present too. hee. what do i want to eat now?

o1. delifrance
02. nachos
03. pasta
o4. fries
05. coke
06. ben&jerry's
07. cup noodles (myojo tom yam)
08. popcorn
09. sakae sushi

someone, eat the buffet with me. the sushi buffet. NA!! we are supposed to eat suki's buffet. let's make it like next week can? or today? i am dam hungry now. haha.

which kind soul that can deliver food to me now, i'll love you for many many years. to eternity, infinity and beyond!!
can't get to sleep. so, i have decided to come up with a christmas list. friends and family, get the hint. hee.

o1. bright red nail polish
o2. lip glosses
o3. le coq sportif bag
o4. tops
o5. shorts
o6. shoes
o7. bags
o8. machi album
o9. new watch
1o. contacts
11. new specs
12. navel piercing
13. earrings
14. rings
15. trips to sentosa
16. lose fats!!
17. money.

so dear all, you guys can actually just get me no. 17 and help me achieve no.16 and no. 15. hee. and of cos, i won't mind if the presents start coming in now. haha. okay la. i should go and do something else, until i think of more stuff to put in. =D

ah. one thing that's most important," I wish for world peace."
((:
i think females are so hot.
the female species is the most beautiful thing God has created.
okay okay. this sounds a little weird. but honestly, i think girls females so hot.
who can dance like a female, other than females?
who can shake like a female, other than fellow females?
why are there gays in the world? cos they want to be females.
who do males like females? cos we are hot.
and why are there lesbians in the world? cos females are hot.
therefore, who doesn't love females?
no one. cos everyone loves us.

the female species is the most beautiful thing God has created.
i suddenly have thoughts about next year. like the usual thing about introduction. then what uniforms should i wear. people, donate me your uniforms. haha. and then, if i change my subject combination, i won't be in loy fatt anymore. kinda miss it already. also..also..i can't remember what i thought of just now. oh wells. everything will be fine. and i'll rock. yeah.
((:
i wanted to blog about something a few days ago. it came back to me just now. but, as you all know, i'm old and senile, i can't remember what it is anymore. hah. joke of the century.

then i also thought of something else to blog about. and once again, my brain has stopped functioning. i mean, the memory function is not working. i wonder, how come i am like this? mm.

oh. and i lost my mom's umbrella the other day. darn. she's very pissed at me. cos, apparently, it is a burberry brolly. oh man. i am like in deep shit la. hope she won't remember this incident for long. or else, i'm dead. sigh.

i realised this entry is entirely written in memory of my memory. haha. this sounds funny. okay. going off to wedding dinner soon. woohoo. my charming cousin, and cute nephews and nieces, here i come!! ((:
people. i'm back. hee. okay okay.

it's my er ge's wedding today!! i mean, the dinner's later. hurhur. i am so excited. he is so charm la. i mean, full of man's charm. hee.

grace says i'm even into my cousin. haha. i agree totally. haha. my family rocks can. haha. we produce all the good looking guys or have good looking son-in-laws. haha.

ohh. i love rain!! he is so hot. so so so hot. seen the way he dance? the way he moves his body? okay, this may sound a little perverted but the way he shakes his butt? woohoo. i'm high. and i am sure YOU are too. hee.

and shaun is so cute!! he is my nephew. note: cousin's son. hee. he is so hyper active la. always running around, saying stuff that i don't know. haha. but he is so cute!! love him!!

and i also have a generation gap with my niece, who happens to be shaun's sister, hazel. she's P3 this year, and i can't understand her. she says the weirdest stuff. am i really getting old? darn it.

can't wait for the dinner la. all my nephews and nieces. cousins and cousin-in-laws. uncles and aunts. distant relatives. unknown people. ahaha.

ahh!! i just finished watching Love at Harvard. hee. don't i just love the show. i like this line that the lead said,"No matter how bad things are, it'll always be a happy ending. it'll always be."
i love it.

okay okay. time to go off and watch more tv!! i am really a couch potato. someone, save me!! haha. bye. heee. i'm high!! woohoo!!
today wasn't too bad.
not as bad as the past few days.
pw is over.
officially.
starting to miss my group mates.
and it's the second last day as a member of 05S79.
the last will be on 28 Dec.
imagine me next year.
i think i'll forget and intro myself as serene from 79.
what a joke.
life's a mess.
that's my only comment now.
everything's fucked up.
sorry for the language.
i..feel like crying.
after reading so many stuff,
stuff that concerns my friends,
my beloved.

my emotions are so easily swayed these days.
i can't stand it.
i can't.

can someone just allow me to cry?
to let it all out.
someone..
someone.

[where's the shoulders when i need it most?]

if i ever had the shoulders.
i don't know.
i really really should stop thinking.
urgh.
someone, help me!!

i am totally helpless.
how i wish i can just chop off my head.
now. this very moment.

hope tomorrow's op goes well.
hope i don't fumble up.
hope i speak slowly.
hope i speak longer.
hope i don't mumble.
hope i do well.

and finally, today was fun.
i want more of today.
i don't want these times to end.
i want it to go on forever.
and ever.
and ever.
as i have said previously, i think too much.
that one liner you said, got me thinking, for days.
i'm confused.
too confused.
i'm tired too.
tired of trying to understand the meaning behind that line.
i should just shut down.
like a computer.
shut down.
but can i?
can i?
i realised these few days that i am actually shy.
okay. i heard you guys screaming no.
but it's true. at least to guys.

okay. not to stranger guys. as in stranger stranger.
but to guys whom i have connections to.
like friend's friend and stuff.

and i also realised i never dared to look straight into a guy's eyes when i talk.
how weird.
took me so long to realise.
i guess, i do used to belong to a girls' school.

another thing, i think too much.
i really let my thoughts run wild.
like totally.
this is bad.
i should stop thinking.
thinking about useless stuff.
someone, try and help me?

oh wells.
happy holidaying dears.
for most, op should be over by now.
time to party.
time to play.

for me, it's time to work harder tomorrow and sunday and monday and tuesday.
people, fight!
i am so tired. long day.
long but good day.
completed dry run 2.
with a little more success.
just a little more.
went to scouts hq to tidy stuff to be sent to pakistan.
tiring.
but happy.
sense of acomplishment.
they are not going to be cold this winter.
at least, not too cold.
same thing tomorrow.
this holiday is going to be so full of love.
((:
i wanted to blog. but i don't feel like blogging all of a sudden. have this weird feeling now. oh wells.

lost.

empty.

i just feel like saying,"What a beautiful accident."
hey hey hey!! sorry for not blogging for sooo long. actually, i did blog last week but there's something wrong with blogger at that time so my long post went missing. sigh. not gonna type that out again. ever. sigh.

okay. went out with grace yesterday. hee. bought a new bag. my ha gao!! hee. quite happy eh. hee. she bought a new bag too. fong fong. haha. see. our bags have really funny names. haha. i suggested going to marina after that so i decided to figure out the route there, by foot. and we happen to chance upon the national library. being curious, we went in to take a look. rather disappointing. the library is so empty. as in books wise. oh wells. love their arts programme though, in celebration with the drama centre. watched the philharmonic winds perform. man. i really wonder why i didn't join band years back. haha. i totally love their performance. (:

okay. i bought a new pair of slippers yesterday too. bright green. hee. green rocks my life big time. ((: and pierced my ear too. third hole on my left ear. haha. i really love my left ear la. hee.

well, can't think of anything else to talk about. will try to blog more yeah. ((: